Listen, I'm a ride-or-die vampire media devotee. Give me Anne Rice's Immortal Universe, Twilight's brooding sparkle brigade, or the Black Dagger Brotherhood's leather-clad chaos—I'm here for all of it.
But holy hell, can we talk about the absolute tragedy that is vampire jewelry in most productions? You're telling me this ancient, immortal being, who's had literal centuries to accumulate wealth and develop exquisite taste, is walking around with a "mystical" ring that looks like it fell out of a Spirit Halloween clearance bin?
Come on.
If your 100-year-old vampire's signature heirloom jewelry couldn't pass for authentic at a middle school Renaissance fair, we have a problem. These are beings who allegedly witnessed the rise and fall of empires. I mean, Dracula didn't spend 500 years perfecting his dramatic cape swirl just to accessorize with something that screams "plastic fantastic." The disrespect is real, people.
Props departments: your vampires deserve better. We vampire nerds definitely deserve better.
End rant. 🧛♂️✨
What's your most oddly specific media pet peeve? Drop it in the comments. Let's bond over our beautifully bizarre obsessions.
“Hey Robyn, what happened to days 5 and 6?” Great question. Please see this TikTok video for the answer(s) plus cute dog photos.
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